the pope walks into a bar

a lone figure was coming across the desert, from the north. joe watched him through the binoculars. “here comes somebody,” he told max. max looked up. “you don’t say so,” he said. he did not sound excited. he did not get up off the rock he was sitting on. but both joe and max watched as the stranger approached. joe and max, and moe and polly, who were in the cabin sleeping, had been waiting for almost two years for the connection. they were almost out of supplies. max and moe and polly had talked of giving up. but joe had held them together, convinced them that they had waited this long, why not wait until the bitter end? they were waiting for the connection. the connection would have the password, to show that he was the connection and once he arrived they would pack up and be ready to pull off the job of the century. of the millenium. the figure in the desert came closer . nether joe nor max were getting their hopes up. other wanderers had come by, but that is all they were … wanderers. they didn’t have the password. the stranger was tall and thin. he wore a wide hat - which he would have needed to cross the desert. “howdy,” the stranger addressed joe and max. “howdy yourself,” joe answered. “my name is ted.” “pleased to meet you, ted. what’s the good word?” ted smiled. “the pope walks into a bar.” that was the password. joe looked at max, and max looked at joe. at last! joe and max stated to laugh, max a little hysterically. joe smiled at ted. “this calls for a celebration.” * they woke moe and polly up, and told them the news. they all agreed to get packed up, get a good night’s sleep, and leave in the morning. joe didn’t really doubt that ted was the man they had been waiting for, but as they sat around after packing up, he got him a little loosened up with his best whiskey and asked a few casual questions. it was obvious ted knew what was going on. * they were getting into the trucks in the morning, when polly pointed into the desert. “who can that be?” she asked joe. another figure was approaching , this one from the northwest. “maybe we should just go,” moe said, from behind the wheel of the first truck. “no,” said joe. “then we would be wondering who he was. we can wait a few minutes for him.” they waited as the second stranger approached. he was short and dark, and wore a bowler hat. joe spoke first. “hello, there.” the second stranger gave joe a big smile with big white teeth. “the pope walks into a bar,” he said. “you don’t say so,” joe replied. “you don’t say so.” “my name is willie,” the second stranger added, with the same big smile. joe pulled out his .45. “i think you got some explaining to do, willie.” joe turned around and saw ted behind him. “and so do you, ted. get over there beside willie.” with a shrug, ted obeyed. joe held the .45 on both of them. “max and moe, get some rope and tie both of these buzzards up.” “and then what, joe?” polly asked, as she scanned the horizon. “i don’t know. let me think about it.” * the next morning. the trucks were still loaded up. ted and willie sat beside them in the sand, their hands tied behind their backs. joe and polly looked out at the desert. max came up behind them. “i say we move out now.” “here comes somebody,” polly said, and pointed to the horizon. joe said nothing . they waited. the third stranger emerged. a woman with long blonde hair, wearing a blue dress, a red hat, and a yellow bandana. “well?” joe asked the woman, when she was close enough to hear him. “the pope walks into a bar,” the woman replied. “who are you?” joe asked. “you know who i am, joe. you all know who i am. you have been waiting for me all your lives.” suddenly the sun disappeared and the sky turned dark as night. and the rain began to fall…